Stress as a Part of Our Everyday Life

Written by: Sandra Zaimović, MSc, Gestalt psychotherapist

“Most often, people seek help only when they have already encountered physical complaints and a diagnosed psychosomatic illness”

We are all, quite well, aware of the importance of caring for our physical health. We know which foods to avoid, how much water to drink every day, and we are familiar with the impact of physical activity on our health.

Sources of stress

Mental health, which is just as important as physical health, is often something we tend to underestimate and neglect. We often find ourselves in everyday situations where we fail to respect our own boundaries, but also those of others, keep everything inside, invest in relationships that are already worn out and that drain us emotionally, or we are overly self-critical. The way we treat our inner self often explains why we find it harder to adapt to everyday stressful situations.

And while such situations surround us every day, because it is hard to live without stress, what matters is that we can learn to cope with it and face it in more acceptable ways.

Stress is most often defined as a physiological and psychological reaction of a person to events in their environment, whereby the personal experience of stress and the emotions that stress evokes in the individual are of essential importance for that reaction.

Sources of stress can be physical (exposure to pain), psychological (conflicts with family, colleagues) and social (unemployment, social situation).

How we react to stress depends on our experience, personal capacities, current mood and many other characteristics of our personality. Psychological suffering caused by constantly present stress is masked by numerous physiological symptoms, so it is hard to recognize and most often results in falling ill with some psychosomatic disease.

Psychosomatic illnesses are physical illnesses for whose onset psychological factors are largely responsible. Suppressing emotions and accumulating anger and rage leads to disturbances in the functioning of the body and the development of a psychosomatic illness.

During a stress reaction, specific emotional, cognitive and physical processes occur. When this lasts for a long time, its consequences are eventually felt on the physical and emotional level – from autoimmune diseases (asthma, diabetes, psoriasis…), migraines, gastritis, cardiovascular diseases, to sleep disorders, burnout at work, depression and impaired interpersonal relationships.

Data from the World Health Organization show that these disorders occur most frequently in the population. In recent years, cancerous diseases have also been linked to stress. This is explained by the fact that chronic stress seriously weakens the body's immunity, and weaker immunity caused by stress increases the likelihood of developing cancer.

Personal boundaries

Being resilient to stress does not mean that a person will never experience stress. It is the ability to effectively overcome life problems and difficulties in a short period of time, whereby recovery from the consequences of stress is also relatively quick.

Most often, people seek help when they have already encountered physical complaints and a diagnosed psychosomatic illness, when they decide to take better care of themselves.

There are many ways in which we can alleviate or eliminate the harmful consequences of everyday stress. This can be psychotherapy, as well as sports or a hobby, and many other anti-stress techniques.

Since mind and body are one whole, health requires constant care for both. My experience shows that stress greatly undermines a client's ability to take care of themselves, mostly because stress brings fatigue that takes away the energy needed to look after oneself.

When it comes to the ability to cope with stress, it is important to know how to set personal boundaries. Clients often say that after a workday they feel as if they have absorbed all the negative energy of their colleagues. Or that other people's problems are very hard for them to bear. Or that they take on too much responsibility that is not theirs, but simply don't know how to say NO.

Foundations for change

A person who has healthy boundaries in place will know how to say NO to demands from the environment that are unacceptable to them, will believe they have the right to rest when they are tired, will not try to meet the expectations of others, and will feel inner peace about their decisions. As a result, they will be less susceptible to stress.

Clients who come in because of stress explore ways of caring for themselves in a healthier manner, learn to understand the process of stress, recognize their own needs and ways of meeting them, become aware of how their psychological and emotional processes are connected with bodily reactions, and learn to set boundaries.

By recognizing our own patterns of behaviour, their connection with negative outcomes, life dissatisfaction and negative emotions, we can create the foundations for change. In the process of inner change, we change our beliefs about ourselves and the world, increase our inner integration, but also influence how we adapt to stressful situations. If you feel you need advice on how to cope with stress, or want to look more deeply into the reasons for your susceptibility to its negative effects, be sure to reach out to a psychologist or psychotherapist to protect your physical as well as mental health

(Text written for Ladies In)